The words you fear, I will not say
But the feeling will be there.
Even though my mouth cannot speak the ideas aloud
You will see the truth in my eyes.
You will know the very thought I am concealing.
Only to avoid embarrassment, I play a fool.
Saturday, August 19, 2006
night and day
----
At night I step into my life a little deeper than I have before.
This is when the things I have seen seem brighter or darker,
And profoundly affect my daily existence.
In my dreams, doors are opened I didn’t know were hinged.
People respond in ways I haven’t dared to ask of them.
And emotions are felt like the lapping of waves upon my toes,
Every day I wake up,
And wish my dreams would stick with my soul until I was able to express them to another.
----
At night I step into my life a little deeper than I have before.
This is when the things I have seen seem brighter or darker,
And profoundly affect my daily existence.
In my dreams, doors are opened I didn’t know were hinged.
People respond in ways I haven’t dared to ask of them.
And emotions are felt like the lapping of waves upon my toes,
Every day I wake up,
And wish my dreams would stick with my soul until I was able to express them to another.
----
it's WAY too early... and I should be in bed
I am not sure where to begin, so I will let my finger glide over the keyboard and have my mind... ... ... get stuck. I am at a much better mental place then I was during the last post. I have a positive outlook on the immediate future and the susequent job prospects. And as far as creativity goes, I just cranked out a bunch of collages and one or two poems. I am feeling full. Which is awesome, because the feeling I was having was that of a dried up river bed thirsty for some water to flow through her vein.
One of my really good friends from college just had a baby. She is incredible. The mom. And she is adorable. The baby. And I am so fucking happy for them!! And my other friend is engaged. He is a sweetheart. The fiance.
Yup, it seems to be about that time. That time when all the couples begin to move on to more adult realities. And the single ones are feeling the pressure. It is like the peer pressure one might feel to lose their virginity. Only I don't feel it directly. And I don't know how to finish this thought...
------
I realize the lessons I learned while in Spain more every day. I didn't truly know what I was supposed/had to gain until after Reggae on the River. I came back full of memories and rejuvenated, but at the same time I was confused and lost at what I was expected to do next.
One of my really good friends from college just had a baby. She is incredible. The mom. And she is adorable. The baby. And I am so fucking happy for them!! And my other friend is engaged. He is a sweetheart. The fiance.
Yup, it seems to be about that time. That time when all the couples begin to move on to more adult realities. And the single ones are feeling the pressure. It is like the peer pressure one might feel to lose their virginity. Only I don't feel it directly. And I don't know how to finish this thought...
------
I realize the lessons I learned while in Spain more every day. I didn't truly know what I was supposed/had to gain until after Reggae on the River. I came back full of memories and rejuvenated, but at the same time I was confused and lost at what I was expected to do next.
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